The alcohol is what actually killed my Dad. He died from cirrhosis of the liver. He was only 46 yrs old. Ya know, Mom told me his landlady (in Chicago) told her that just a few nights before he died she’d seen him sitting out on the stairs crying. He told her he just wanted to see his daughter and his daughter’s mother again. That never happened. It’s funny, I can remember folks at the funeral home saying, “Only 46 years old!! He was so young!!” And all I could think of was, “46 yrs. old? YOUNG? Sure seems old to me.” Of course, I was only 15 so it sure sounded old. Now, at 72, I realise, boy, he really was young!
You know, it took me over 65 years to forgive that man but I finally have. I remember one time when he was sitting in his bed reading the Sunday newspaper. He asked me to come sit down on the bed next to him and then him reaching over and trying to touch my privates. I think I told my Mom about that, but besides her, I’ve never told another single soul.
I’ll tell you another story about him too. One night not to long after I’d been released from Geneva, I was at the laundry mat pulling clothes out of the dryer when the big front door swung open by itself. I was the only person there. It was late and I was covered in goose bumps when that door opened. I could sense my Dad’s presence. I was SO scared I just threw the clothes in the basket without folding them and hurried out to my car and took off for home. (I had my own car then and was working at G.E.) When I got home I went quickly to my Mom’s room and got in bed with her and pulled up the cover over my face as I could still feel him around me. I started saying over and over and over, “Leave me ALONE!!! I HATE you!!! Stay away from me!!!” Then, do you know, I felt him bending over to me, kiss my cheek and POOF! he was gone! I never felt his presence again….ever.
Isn’t that the weirdest thing? It’s true tho. I never talked about that incident to anyone, not even my Mom. I figured she’d think I’d lost it and was going nuts. But as God is my judge, that’s the honest to God TRUTH! I couldn’t SEE him, but I knew he was standing there. OMG, talk about freaking out! So anyway, I finally after 60 years or so, told him out loud that I loved him and totally forgave him. And I do.